Sufi Advice

As she crossed the desert on the back of a dromedary, Marian was unable to enjoy the sunrise that turned the dunes into a golden sea. In the distance the palm trees of an oasis larger and more lush than he had imagined loomed.

His mind, however, was still anchored to the world of obligations that he had left in the city. Her husband walked between her and the guide, turning from time to time with a smile. Pedro had given her that exotic trip for her silver wedding anniversary. He had thought that a week away from the madding crowd would do them good.

However, as soon as she landed at the small Egyptian airport, she had begun to worry.

While they were waiting for the van that would take them to the camel caravan, she had said to her husband:

“Do you think we’re good at leaving the boys alone for a whole week?”

“Woman …” Pedro reassured her. Sometimes you forget that they are no longer children and go to university. That we are here is almost more of a gift to them than to us. So they have the house to invite their friends on the weekend, and the rest of the days they can study until dawn without you quarreling with them.

“They’re going to be eating badly all week,” she said uneasily. They sure throw out frozen treats and sandwiches every day.

“Make it up!”

“I don’t like leaving your mother unattended for so long, either.” It does not stand alone.

“A person lives with her and takes care of her,” Pedro reminded her. I do not know why we spend so much money if you are aware of every detail later.

“And the office?” She had said at last. What will they think that I took a vacation in the middle of the year?

“They can think what they want!” You have accumulated enough overtime to go around the world without having the right to protest. Do you want to stop thinking about others and enjoy yourself a little?

That was the last thing they talked about before the caravan left, still at night, with other couples of travelers who were heading towards that paradise in the middle of the desert. Upon arrival, under the first light of the morning, Pedro’s jaw dropped at the hundreds of palm trees that sprouted between the whitewashed houses in a cubic way. There was a street market and a cafe in the central square, where old men in djellaba chatted animatedly while smoking hookahs.

After being welcomed into a romantic hotel with rooms set around a courtyard, they slept for a couple of hours to rest from the long night’s journey. As in his own home, Pedro fell asleep instantly; meanwhile, Marian turned to chores that she had left thousands of miles away. I couldn’t help it. He had a bad conscience for not being available to the legion of people for whom he toiled.

“You seem to be in debt to the world,” her own children had told her many times. “Relax, Mom!”

When Marian opened her eyes, Pedro was no longer in bed. She dressed quickly and left in anguish toward the reception. Maybe he’s unwell from the trip or from this awful heat, he thought. A young employee in a mortarboard took it upon himself to dispel his fears.

“Her husband is in the hammam.” He has not wanted to wake her up and has left a note that he will be back for lunch, ”he said with a beaming smile. Go for a mint tea at the café on the square. The Sufi sage has arrived …

In order not to antagonize the young man, Marian headed there, but stopped when she saw that the four tables under the canopy were occupied. An old man who was alone in one of them waved for him to take one of the chairs. Marian shyly sat down and ordered tea while the old man watched her with the hookah to his lips. He immediately guessed where it came from and was quick to speak to him in his language. Without a doubt, despite living in the desert, he was a man of the world.

“You don’t like tea?”

-I like very much! She replied, embarrassed. It’s delicious.

“Then you don’t like the oasis … Maybe it’s too small a place for a city lady.”

“On the contrary, it seems wonderful to me.”

“Why are you frowning, then?”

Convinced that she was before the Sufi sage, Marian confessed to him the concerns that had kept her awake since the holidays had started. The old man listened carefully. Then he spoke:

—I am going to tell you what Nasrudín, a true sage, explained to his disciples when they asked him how they should behave with others.

“What did he tell them?”

—Three things —the old man began—: “Good is he who treats others as he would like to be treated. Generous is the one who treats others better than he expects to be treated. And wise is he who knows how he and others should be treated, in what way and to what extent ”.

“So …” Marian murmured confused, “which is better: to be good, generous or wise?”

“Definitely the latter.” If you are wise, you do not have to be obsessed with being good or generous, because you will limit yourself to doing what is necessary at each moment and with each person, without forgetting yourself.