Solve Your Problems … Without Doing Anything

Everybody has ever lived it. In times of tension or conflict, we often find that whatever we do or say only makes things worse.

After a clash or misunderstanding with other people, any attempt to clarify things only increases the tension. Even if you try to solve the problem through a long and explanatory e-mail, this action only generates replies and counter-replies, causing the reason for the discussion to balloon like a balloon.

Against this spiral that does not solve anything and causes us suffering, Taoism recommends “letting things be”, doing nothing even if our anxiety pushes us to intervene.

The Chinese philosophy of Wu Wei (無為), which can be translated as “no action”, is to let events take their course without trying to force things.

Doing nothing is not synonymous with sloppiness

The Wu Wei, however, is not an invitation to laziness or apathy.

The wise person, according to the Tao Te Ching, “doing nothing leaves nothing undone.”

And this is achieved, although it seems a contradiction, “not acting, without trying to achieve an end.” In the words of Lao-tzu: “To study a science you have to know a little more every day. To cultivate the Tao, one has to act less every day ”.

The risk of living on the defensive

People who live somewhere between urgency and anxiety are basically reactive. That is, they are always reacting to what they identify as threats, dangers, or conspiracies.

Here are two examples: first, that of the employee who feels that their bosses or colleagues not enough to have confidence in him, which claimed to
through their actions or justifying, which paradoxically only generate achieves suspicion because all end up thinking it acts to achieve an end.

Secondly, the person who, fearing the infidelity of his partner, supervises her with interrogations, questions her every encounter and watches her movements to try to hunt her down. Contrary to his intentions, what this pressure causes in the other is discomfort and, ultimately, the
search for another person with whom to feel at peace, with which the suspicious attitude becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Even when the conflict is real and damage has occurred due to unfortunate words or actions, until the troubled waters recede, the Wu Wei advises not to add more noise to the noise.

If it is necessary to make a decision, we must limit ourselves to doing for ourselves what depends on us, without trying to correct the actions of others.

Time puts everyone in their place

The Arabic proverb “Sit at the door of your house and you will see the corpse of your enemy pass by” expresses this same Taoist conception: who is always intriguing, fighting, looking for results, digs his own grave, while who remains calm and he knows how to wait, flowing with life, he
is always in a favorable position.

In this sense, the Wu Wei philosophy is identified with the power of water, which, being the softest and weakest element, is able to end up shaping the hardest rocks.

As Bruce Lee pointed out in his famous “Be water, my friend”, water can take any shape, and even when it is divided into thousands of drops it can come together again, forming an immense lake or sea. Without opposing the course of things, without announcing his intentions or claiming anything, he achieves much more than someone who tries to precipitate the facts.

This is the philosophy of the Wu Wei, which also takes as an example plants, which grow naturally, silently, without interrupting the heartbeat of life.

Change your look: from the outside to the inside

Applied to our daily existence, the Wu Wei advises to prioritize the inner work over the outer.

Instead of acting on people and circumstances that we cannot control, patiently make the necessary changes within ourselves . According to ancient Chinese wisdom, ordering the emperor’s palace is to rule the country well, since the palace is a reflection of its relationship with the outside world. A law of the Kybalion said in the same sense: “As it is Inside, it is Outside.”

Who lives in constant inner turmoil inadvertently causes turbulence in the world around him, and then blames the world for it.

A typical example is that of the person with a lack of self-esteem who looks for a partner, but only finds superficial or destructive relationships. The repetition of these patterns ends the moment you change your gaze from the outside to the inside. By caring for yourself, rather than caring for others, you naturally attract people with that same balance.

Coded Wu Wei: when she stops looking for anything, she finds everything she needs, including herself.